Crossroads

I have a problem. I have many, many problems. I have so many serious issues, that I don’t know where to start. Ok, maybe they are not so life critical and serious. But one of them is, that I am my own worst enemy. I tend to like to do things right, most of the time. I don’t like things half-baked, except when it’s convenient.  If I’m in a relationship I’m all in, except when im tired, or moody or that time of the month?… shhhh. When I get a new project at work I’m guns blazing, for the first few weeks. When school asks me to do something or the kids have to prepare for a poetry festival. I’m there. All in. Except during working hours… working mom here people!

I have so many problems I don’t know which one to choose to resolve. Does this mean I invariably resolve none and put everything on the back-burner with a label “Stuff I must do later” Or “Stuff we will never do because it’s too hard?”

The problem is that when we are faced with many paths to take often we choose the path of least resistance. The one that has a pro’s list longer that the con’s list. The one that pleases the most people and the one that maybe requires the least effort to attain success. Or rather some level of success as opposed to complete failure. The notion of something is better that nothing.

No – this must stop!

Choose something, do Something, make a decision based on what you want to do, choose when you want it, do things because you have passion for it, when you love something give it time and give it attention. So often we settle. We don’t fight for the things we want, we accept the hand we’re dealt. Don’t settle! Anymore…

After some thought and much introspection I have come to realise that we actually need to establish what we choose to do, by the end state. This phrase end state was recently uttered to me by my husband, as he was relaying a conversation with some new Exec that joined the team. At first, we both giggled at the new buzzword of this exec, and we chatted about how all these guys at this level come with some flavor of buzzwords that they coin as their own. Anyways, the more we spoke about the subject the more it made sense to me. This idea formulated in my mind about, how we problem solve in life, in general.

When we have a big decision to make we often do pro’s and con’s. We constantly focussing on achieving results and showing some success but that may not be the actual thing we want, it’s in the vicinity of what we want.

Think about how different our decision-making would be if we chose to focus on the impossible, the unattainable, the green fields, blue sky kinda solutions or goals. What if we didn’t plan for the obstacles along the path. What if we chose based purely on the reward or the utopia of the desired end state.

If you do this with conviction, and passion, and drive you will achieve the impossible. You will choose the path that leads you to ultimate happiness and endless love and the greatest success story you have ever heard.

Think about a goal you wanted to achieve. Lose 5 kg’s this month. What if instead of thinking about the pain of the exercise, or the loss of the yummy delicious sugary treat you usually indulge in. We don’t think about the true end result of what we want. We get distracted by the immediate rewards. What if all we said is I can lose 5 kg’s, I will not eat that cupcake and I will run today. If I did that for 30 days I would mostly likely achieve my goal. The problem is I focus on the cupcake I’m not able to eat and then by day 2 I have a dozen cupcakes in front of me, to reward myself for yesterday’s run 🙂

When faced with these crossroads let’s assess differently. Let’s look at the thing we want most out of the path and believe that it is achievable. Let’s focus on the journey rather than the unrealistic destination. Let’s believe that we deserve the utopia. That all the problems we see with this choice is solvable, all the obstacles seen and unseen are challenges accepted! Then you know what this means? It means, that it can be yours. The thing that you want most, the thing you think you cannot have, can be yours.

The success you envision can materialise. The love you want in your life is right there within reach. Right now, I want to stop here. Because already my mind is forming sentences to accommodate all the what if scenarios, all the naysayers questions and all the self-doubt telling me I’m not worthy.

But just believe it today and then believe again tomorrow and then the next day and what you get in the end will still be more…. so much more than before.

Everything in the universe is within you.

Ask all from yourself. – Rumi

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